I have to do check-ins with my employees, and sometimes there is a really awkward time where I need to wait for them to do something. Or I just corrected something and am awaiting revisions. Do I sound as pretentious as humanly possible? I hope so.
I need to blog about my horrible road trip (boo) and my amazing 36 hours in Minneapolis, a la Kosice, (yay!). But, that is going to be for a different day.
Alas, I'm really going to Harvard, and my 15 month stint in Denver is completely done.
To celebrate, I decided to have a bar golf/scavenger hunt/make t-shirts.
With the Olympics and my overwhelming desire for clever references that no one undertands, I wanted to use the British "Keep Calm and Carry On" poster. I thought it was suited for drunken debauchery. And, below that phrase it said, "James will be at Harvard soon." That way strangers knew I was going to Harvard.
The reference is from an old British propaganda poster from 1939, during the blitzkreig from Hitler. This is pretentious, but I honestly assumed everyone had heard about it and knew the reference.
It wasn't until after I passed out the t-shirts that I realized my foray into pretentious douchebaggery. I explained the poster and everyone realized that I was going to Harvard and was amping up the nerd.
Our list (for a team):
Which means I did 9 shots of vodka in the space of 20 minutes.
Which means I danced intensely for the next 3 hours.
- Swap shirts with a stranger in public (no bathrooms allowed)
- +5 if both males
- +10 if one male/one female
- +20 if both female
- Make out with a stranger +10
- Get stranger to drunk dial home +10 points
- Business cards with hand-written cell numbers on the back +10
- Sexting with these people +20
- Inappropriate pictures from business cards + 100
- Serenade someone very loudly, very publically +5
- Call Me Maybe +15
- Any Spice Girls/DMX song +30
- 6 Different Beer Bottle Caps + 15
- 6 Person Human Pyramid (with 3 strangers) +50
- Teammate working behind the bar +40
- Pictures with a Drag Queen + 10
- Figure out James’ favorite shot (buy him his favorite, James initials)
- Slippery Nipple
- Red Headed Slut
- Blow Job
- Find a mullet +10
- Team Photo with 2 Strangers in Bathroom Stall +25
- Win a Dance Off +15
- Get Someone to Buy Entire Team a Round +50
All in all, it was a pretty good night. Except KO cb'ed me like a mofo. Bitch.